Reproduced from The Voice (Texas PTA Magazine) – Spring 2010

As a working mom of two gifted young children, I struggled for several years trying to find the right program for my son, who was finding classroom work boring and acting out because of it. In order to keep a closer eye on my son and learn more about how I could help him at home, I became a volunteer teacher in a gifted program at a local public elementary school. Through that experience and the journey to find the right program for him, I learned that parental advocacy is the most important act to leaving no child left behind.

The education system in the United States falls short in many areas and fails many of our nation’s brightest young minds. While there are many resources available to low-performing students, there are not nearly as many programs and resources available to the gifted students who need more challenging course work, even at an early age. For this reason it is increasingly important for parents to be closely involved as their child’s advocate.

Gifted children are highly sensitive and are often seen as more emotional than other children their age. Often seen as argumentative or manipulative with their teachers and parents, gifted children try to out smart those in authority. An advanced vocabulary and sense of humor can often leave them misunderstood by their peers, lonely and depressed.

All of these things required a stable environment of support and understanding by the parents. When gifted children feel they are able to manipulate those in authority, they feel vulnerable, so it is also important to have a consistent discipline and rewards system in the home. Parents need to keep the lines of communication open and listen to their child’s fears and concerns behind the emotional outbursts, not just deal with their feelings as childish or unwarranted.

It is also important to educate the professionals involved in your child’s life. Today’s teachers, coaches and counselors are often under-educated about the needs of gifted children. It is often assumed that gifted children will be the best behaved and need the least supervision in a classroom or group setting. However, it is imperative to relay the information that you know is helpful for your child in terms of discipline and rewards in order for everyone to have a successful learning experience. Keep the lines of communication open with these professionals as well and as your child.

Parental involvement is also key as your child adapts to new adults in authority. While joining the PTA and bringing treats to class parties is important and valued work, it is important to know how best to get involved so your child benefits from your presence and time at school. One of the first things I recommend to parents interested in getting involved at school is to talk to your child’s teacher. The teacher has to understand your child to meet the needs of your child. The communication with the teacher should be positive, proactive and persistent. If you still have concerns, talk to the school counselor or gifted program coordinator. If none of these meetings satisfactorily solve your problem, talk to the principal. The parents should always be clear on what they want to discuss before these meetings. It may help you to write the points and questions before the meeting. Stay focused, on topic and be professional, as parents tend to get emotional in situations that concern their children.

There has been encouraging progress in gifted programs in public and private school settings, but by far the most important influence in the child’s life is the parents and life at home. Several techniques from the Montessori approach can be put into place in the home to supplement your child’s public school gifted education. Before I opened Riddle Street Montessori for the Gifted and Talented, I incorporated these techniques in my home while my son was in a public school setting.

The Montessori Method is child focused. Every child is actively involved in the learning process and can choose work that appeal to their interests. This freedom builds a strong sense of independence and self-confidence as skills increase. The Montessori classrooms help to create self-disciplined and self-motivated children who are empowered by opportunities for independence, mixed age learning and the desire to pursue knowledge and purposeful work. The teacher or directress is not the center of the classroom but guides and directs each child according to their needs.

Montessori Method was developed as a home-based method. So it is easy to incorporate the philosophy at home by anyone who is not a Montessorian. Parents can provide the child with a variety of reading materials. Reading is taught phonetically so practice sorting objects and pictures by their beginning sounds and later by ending and middle sounds. The child can at this point start putting simple words to make sentences and phrases. Introduce counting and simple math concepts with tangible items rather than abstract methods. Parents can create a chart of numerals with the child to help them recognize the numerals. These techniques work well for younger children.

For older children, ask questions related to their topic of interest, lead them on a discussion and ask them to research it. Researching and trying to find answers by themselves are very attractive for gifted kids as they are always curious about things. Using their curiosity to teach is the best method for children to learn. By incorporating these methods, I hope you find techniques to make your home a place of learning and discovery for all of your children.